tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC February 26, 2016 11:35pm-12:38am PST
all right that's the end of the week. appreciate your time. >> for all of us thanks for joining us right now and kerry washington on "jimmy kimmel live". >> tune >> dicky: from hollywood - it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, kerry washington, nikolaj coster-waldau, "this week in unnecessary censorship" and music from jason derulo with cleto and the cletones. and now, nobody move, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
>> jimmy: welcome to the show, i'm jimmy, i'm the host. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. very nice. that's very nice. somebody in the audience was doing a cheerleader move, which i appreciated. you never lose that, do you. oh, boy. i'm glad you're here. especially after what a mess it was last night. last night, those of you here know, last night the unthinkable happened. it rained. water came down. onto us. some of it got on my body. which was scary. when it rains in l.a. we don't know what to do with ourselves. it sounds like we're joking. it isn't a joke. i went to dinner after the show. first of all i forgot my phone. i left my phone at home require went to dinner from work. so i had no idea where i was going. even though the restaurant i was going to, i've been there probably five times.
but i now rely so much on my phone to tell me where to go. the part of my brain that knows where things are has been erased. i still remember all the lyrics to all the huey lewis songs but i can't find my house anymore without electronic assistance. so when i did get to dinner 20 minutes late everyone there -- everybody's a mess. including me. we're all acting like we just drove through the chase scene from "mad max: fury road." people are panting. it was as if we'd been caught in the eye of a hurricane and narrowly escaped. it wasn't even raining that hard. really was just kind of barely raining. but we were frazzled. i had to be unfrazzled this morning. whenever it rains our local news channels are right there on scene to capture every drop of the liquid drama that unfolds. >> since we arrived in malibu around 6:00 p.m., the rain hasn't stop falling. drivers had to slow down along a very wet pch.
the winds haven't been strong but the flags were moving. >> jimmy: yeah, flags were moving. drivers had to slow down. had i known the flags were moving i wouldn't have tried to go to dinner. thank god we're alive. we're all heroes here tonight. in south carolina, things are looking up for ted cruz. ted cruz for the first time is ahead of donald trump in a national poll. of course trump is suing the poll so we'll see how that goes. according to the new nbc news/"wall street journal" poll, ted cruz is on top with 28%. trump is close behind with 26%. marco rubio is in third. trump of course is very unhappy about this result. he called the poll phoney and a joke. and it is a bit suspicious. because rupert murdoch owns "the wall street journal." he's definitely not a donald trump fan. the poll is what they call an outlier. because every other national poll shows trump with a big lead. in fact, it's such an outlier, it might just be a liar without the out. but rupert murdoch denies it. he might be the least of donald
trump's problems right now. he has a new feud going with pope francis. not kidding. the pope is in mexico on his way home he was asked about donald trump. which is funny on its own, really. and the pope said, a person who thinks only about building walls wherever they may be and not building bridges is not a christian. which of course is nonsense, donald trump made it very clear that his favorite book is the bible, so he's definitely a christian. and he wasted no time today firing back at the pope. >> as i'm walking up here they said, mr. trump, the pope made a statement about you. i said, the pope? what did the pope say? i like the pope. was it good or bad? because if it's good i like the pope. if it's bad i don't like the pope. >> jimmy: he doesn't like -- how is this happening? if i told you two years ago that donald trump would be in a fight with the pope you'd think i was insane.
i mean this makes taylor swift versus kanye west like nothing. i feel like we've become acclimated. here's more from pope versus trump. the pope is being told donald trump is not a nice person. okay? donald trump is a very nice person and i'm a very -- i am a very nice person. and i'm a very good christian. because the pope said something to the effect that maybe donald trump isn't christian. okay? and he's questioning my faith. i was very surprised to see it. but i am a christian. i'm proud of it. okay. for a religious leader to question a person's faith is disgraceful. >> jimmy: the pope is disgraceful! and the pope today responded on his twitter page. he said, thank you to mexico and to all mexicans may the lord and the blessed virgin of guadalupe accompany you always, donald trump is a loser. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he should be above that, he really should, i'm on
donald trump's side. [ laughter ] a town hall event with trump, bush, kasich in south carolina tonight and a town hall for the democrats in las vegas. last night ted cruz, marco rubio, and ben carson got a chance to make an impression on the south carolina voters. the primary there is on saturday. anderson cooper asked personal questions. marco rubio again said -- he asked what kind of music he liked. he said he liked electronic dance music. edm. why do we need to know this? are we electing a president or uber driver? [ laughter ] rubio said he's a big fan of '90s west coast hip-hop, which i think probably means he liked the "fresh prince of bel air" theme song. [ laughter ] hillary clinton revealed her favorite type of music is whatever type of music you like. during the town hall, ben carson touted his experience as a surgeon. he said he's had to take more 2:00 a.m. phone calls than anybody else in the race. which must be why he looks like he's falling asleep all the
time. but by the way, when can we stop pretending ben carson is really one of the candidates? enough already, right? speaking of kooky doctors. i mentioned this last night. this is a good one. in palm beach, florida, an 18-year-old kid was arrested for operating a fake medical practice. he had an office, he had a grand opening, he has a website. this is a picture from his website. that's the kid. his name is malachi love robinson. two red flags. number one, doctors don't generally have fauxhawks. and also usually don't take glamor shots at the mall. this isn't the first time he's done something like this. he was caught posing as a gynecologist in january. what teenage boy hasn't done that? he was released on bond yesterday. for some reason agreed to sit for a grilling this morning on "good morning america." >> are you a doctor of anything? anything at all? >> i do currently hold a ph.d. in what i don't feel comfortable disclosing.
because that is not the issue here. >> jimmy: right, the issue -- oh no, wait, that is the issue here. he has a ph.d. he must have went to a grammar school with some kind of a graduate option or something. i tell you, i like this kid, he's got a little something we used to call spunk. since when can you be arrested for pretending to be a doctor? dr. phil has been doing this for 15 years. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he walks free. we have a good show. from "scandal" kerry washington is here with us. [ cheers and applause ] from "game of thrones" and "gods of egypt," we have nikolaj coster-waldau, and music tonight from jason derulo who is a very, very popular -- i was listening to one of his songs this afternoon. you know the song "wiggle"? okay, so it's a huge hit. i realized as i was listening to it some of the words might be hard for a lot of people to follow.
tonight jason has agreed to help explain the meaning of the song. it's time for "new lyrics for old people." [ cheers and applause ] jason derulo, come on out. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome. good to see you. you ready to do this? >> absolutely. >> jimmy: i think it's going to be helpful and educational. you start and then i'll explain. >> all right, beautiful. ♪ ♪ you know what to do with that big fat butt ♪ ♪ wiggle wiggle wiggle >> jimmy: what jason's saying here is, you're an expert at manipulating your impressively large posterior, so go ahead and shake it aggressively. ♪ wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle it just a ittle bittle shwing ♪ >> jimmy: again, keep shaking it. shake it shake it shake it but with a touch of panache. ♪ paddy cake paddy cake with no
hands ♪ ♪ got me making wedding plans >> jimmy: he's saying you're doing such a good job with the butt shaking he's hiring a caterer, he's choosing a color scheme, he's renting a tuxedo because he's about to propose, right? >> perfect. ♪ if i take pictures while you do your dance ♪ ♪ i can make you famous on instagram ♪ >> jimmy: he'll take photos of you and post them online for strangers to enjoy. ♪ hot dammit your booty like two pennies ♪ >> jimmy: pretty straightforward. self-explanatory. ♪ go ahead and go ham sandwich >> jimmy: okay, this is the part i don't understand. what does go ahead and go ham sandwich mean? >> you know what this means, it means you're old too, man. >> jimmy: i know. that's why i'm doing this.
>> well, so there's a phrase that they say you go ham. which means go hard. you know, go crazy. >> jimmy: okay. >> and go ham sandwich is a step further. so it's like, go harder than a [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: oh. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ whoa i can't stand it >> jimmy: so sandwich means [ bleep ]? there's going to be a problem at lunch. all right. so ham sandwiches may get you hard, to continue you can't stand it -- >> exactly. ♪ you know what to do with that big fat butt ♪ >> jimmy: again, you're still doing good with your butt. ♪ wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle ♪ ♪ a ittle bittle schwing >> jimmy: wiggle a whole bunch. it all makes sense now.
jason derulo, everybody. we'll take a break, we'll be right back, guillermo and i help kids with their homework, be right back! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ has your phone turned you into a control freak? like, scoring the perfect table. or getting a better seat. or let's say there's an accident. if you have esurance, you can use their app to start a claim. upload a few photos and an esurance claims rep will help you get your money fast. maybe that doesn't make you a control freak. more like a control enthusiast. auto and home insurance for the modern world. esurance. an allstate company. can't get unlimited data for your family? other carriers either don't offer it, or it's too expensive! not t-mobile! get three lines of unlimited 4g lte data for just fifty bucks each, and get a fourth line, free! hurry. only at t-mobile.
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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, there. welcome back to the show. kerry washington, nikolaj coster-waldau, and music from jason derulo. first it's time for something fun and educational. not only am i the host of this show, guillermo and i for how many years have we been doing this? >> guillermo: 20 years. >> jimmy: the last 20 years guillermo and i have been cohosting a show on local access television on which we -- 20 years? it's been that long? >> guillermo: yeah. long time. yeah. >> jimmy: wow.
we help kids with their homework. now for your laughing and learning pleasure, it's time for "the homework helper guys." >> science and geography, mathematics and anatomy, physics and biology, if you want to get wise call the homework helper guys. >> jimmy: good afternoon, i am mr. kimmel and this is mr. guillermo. we are the homework helper guys here to help you with your homework every week at this time. thanks for tuning in. i see we have a student on our video chat. hello, what is your name? >> my name's anderson. i live in winfield, illinois. >> jimmy: what can we help you with today? what subjects are you having trouble with? >> i have some math problems for you. >> jimmy: okay, good, that's where i really shine. let me go to the chalkboard. >> okay. so a musician's hair was originally three inches long. >> jimmy: all right, three inches long.
>> okay. okay, she asked her hairdresser to cut five-sixths of it off. >> jimmy: five-sixths. no, that's 5 multiplied by 6. 5/6 would be a fraction. draw a line right there. there you go, okay. okay. all right. keep going. >> okay. how many inches did she have cut off? >> jimmy: we got to figure out how much hair she cut off? >> yeah. >> jimmy: how does she look, how's the haircut look? >> she looks like a -- a bit different now. >> jimmy: how many inches do you think she cut off? >> well, that's the answer. [ laughter ] >> guillermo: he's very smart. >> jimmy: i guess so. let's figure it out. we've got 3 over 1. okay. times 5 over 6. okay? >> yeah. >> jimmy: so we want to multiply. we get 15 over 6.
so that's 15/6. so now we divide 6 into 15. and we have 2 3/6. which is 2 1/2. so the answer is 2 1/2 inches. >> the answer is 1/2. >> jimmy: 1/2 an inch? >> yeah. not 2 1/2. >> jimmy: if you knew the answer, why are you calling us? [ laughter ] ♪ if you want to get wise call the homework helper guys ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we don't have time to waste. all right. one more thing before we head, it is thursday night which means it's time to bleep and blur the big tv moments of the week whether they need it or not, "this week in unnecessary censorship." >> i see george clinton over there, a man who has done more for the world [ bleep ] than we
could hope to dream up. >> i looked at barack obama's [ bleep ]. barack obama's [ bleep ], which john kerry later described as unbelievably small -- >> michelle this valentine's day i'm going to [ bleep ] you right. >> i want to [ bleep ] you right now but i don't know how. >> taylor, why must you slay like this? >> hello! >> let me tell you something about the ham house. even a steaming pile of [ bleep ] can't ruin their good bacon. >> two days ago he said he would take his pants off and [ bleep ] everybody. that's why nobody reports that. >> ladies and gentlemen, alabama [ bleep ]! >> not so typical, hillary clinton is [ bleep ]ing like a dog. >> bark bark bark bark! >> alison and david -- >> beautiful [ bleep ]. >> elmo, your [ bleep ] is amazing! [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]
>> jimmy: tonight on the show music from jason derulo. from "game of thrones" nikolaj coster-waldau. and we'll be right back with kerry washington. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ e time. and your ford dealer is the place, to get 0% financing for 60 months on a ford suv. that's right. just announced. ford explorer...edge...escape... and expedition... are available with 0% financing for 60 months. ford suvs. designed to help you be unstoppable. no wonder ford is america's best selling brand. but hurry, 0% financing for 60 months on ford suvs is a limited time offer. see your ford dealer today. but this year, i can go to block and pay half, what i paid my other guy. so follow us, we're going to h&r block. [richard] switch to block and pay half.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi there. tonight from "game of thrones" and the new movie "gods of egypt nikolaj coster-waldau. and then this is his album called "everything is 4." jason derulo from the samsung stage. [ cheers and applause ] next week is a good week. who's on next week? 18 paul, ellen pompeo, gordon ramsay, kelly ripa, norman reedis, music from yo gotti and wolf mother.
our "jimmy kimmel after the oscars" biggest night of the year. our biggest night of the year. with ben affleck, tracy morgan, j.k. simmons, mike tyson, matthew roderick and nathan lane, and many more surprises in store. it will be very strong show and you are invited to strip down to your underwear and watch it. for five seasons our first guest has orchestrated and weaved her way through more political chicanery and sexual intrigue than bernie sanders and jeb bush combined. she plays crisis manager olivia pope on "scandal" thursday nights at 9:00 on abc. please welcome kerry washington! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how are you? good to see you. >> very good to see you, always nice to see you. >> jimmy: i like the dress, that's a dress if i was a woman, or just dressed like one, i would pick out for myself. >> that's very nice to say. are you making an announcement
tonight? >> jimmy: well -- it is time, yes. it's something we've shared privately for years. >> yes. >> jimmy: how many times have you been on the show? >> i actually realized yesterday that this is my ninth appearance. >> jimmy: your ninth appears. >> on jimmy kimmel. [ cheers and applause ] so what i was thinking was ten is special. ten is a nice round number. >> jimmy: it is. >> i did some research about anniversaries. because i know you want to get me something. >> jimmy: oh, okay. i thought this was headed the other direction. >> no, no, no. so the traditional gift for a ten-year anniversary, let's say, is aluminum. >> jimmy: that sounds great. >> i have enough foil in my kitchen. but the modern gift for a ten-year anniversary is diamonds. >> jimmy: oh, it's diamonds. really. >> so -- right? [ cheers and applause ] >> the season finale of "scandal," tennis bracelet, a
ring would be inappropriate. >> jimmy: the ring would be inappropriate, yeah. then i would get what? just sex? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: the guy has to get something. i mean, diamonds -- >> the pleasure of my company. and i would let you borrow this dress. >> jimmy: that sounds like a deal. i'll get you one of those big old -- what are those called? cubic zirconium diamonds. those are the best diamonds. >> no, no. >> jimmy: i see them on qvc. >> those are fake diamonds. >> jimmy: beautiful fake diamonds. >> i don't do fake visits to jimmy kimmel, i need the real thing. >> jimmy: "game of thrones" fan. >> huge. >> jimmy: are you excited that -- >> king slayer! >> jimmy: he doesn't like to be called that. >> that's true. >> jimmy: i don't think him the actor but jamie doesn't like to be called. >> that's true. >> jimmy: nikolaj probably doesn't care. >> i knew the person really excited about him being here is my mother so i brought her tonight.
she didn't want to sit in the audience because my dressing room is next to his dressing room. i have a fear she's got a cup against the wall to hear what he's doing. >> jimmy: that's the best-case scenario. >> yes, really. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: is he her favorite? >> he's her favorite. she's just a huge -- we all are, in my family, huge "game of thrones" fan. >> jimmy: she doesn't have a problem with the sex and violence on the show? >> no. my mother is should very elephant, graceful, intellectual. but she will sit through a sex scene like nobody's business. she doesn't sweat at all. and last week, actually, i watched our "scandal" episode with her. i have a three-minute crazy sex scene. >> jimmy: yeah, you did. >> scott foley. and i was sweating and fidgeting. my mother was like, "good work." okay. >> jimmy: that's weird. >> so weird. >> jimmy: that's a weird experience. >> i tweeted, i'm watching this
scene with my mother. everybody's like, she's the best! >> jimmy: your birthday was a couple of weeks ago. >> it was. >> jimmy: i'm sorry i didn't get you anything for that either. >> you can make it for it with the tennis bracelet. >> jimmy: with the diamonds. what did you do? do you have a big celebration? do you ignore it? >> i had all these grand plans. like i was going to get a bunch of friends together and see the new cirque du soleil show, get a bunch of girls and see j. lo in vegas. i never got tickets. i didn't arrange -- i just was not on top of it. so at the last minute i had the perfect night. my husband and i had date night at disneyland. we were there to ring in the birthday. >> jimmy: without your daughter? >> oh yeah. [ laughter ] >> disney's great for grownups. the best. >> jimmy: it's not date night if you bring the kids, yeah. >> no. >> jimmy: you got in the car and went to disneyland? >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's the weird thing about living in l.a. >> it's right there. >> jimmy: one night i was driving around, like, we could go to disneyland right now. >> did you? >> jimmy: no.
[ laughter ] i have a lot of plans. i'm not driving to disneyland. >> yeah, yeah, great. >> jimmy: what's your favorite ride? >> i like what they've done with the new space mountain. because they've redone it as a "star wars" ride. >> jimmy: right. >> so it's faster and there's images from the movie, it's great. i love tower of terror. i like the scary rides. >> jimmy: yeah, see, i don't. and i'm a vomiter. which is a problem. >> whoa. whoa. you are not invited on my trip. >> jimmy: i'm a lot of fun. we're going to take a break. when we come back "scandal" was earlier tonight. we can't say anything about it. because of our studio audience here. but kerry washington is with us. we'll be right back!
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jason derulo. last week tony goldwyn was here, he plays the president, fitz, your sometimes love interest on the show. he also directs certain episodes of the show. >> he does. i heard he said not nice things about me. >> jimmy: that's true. he said that of all the cast members, you give him -- you're the most difficult, you give him the hardest time when he's directing. is that true? >> i don't really want to address whether it's true or not. i want to talk about what kind of babies go on national television to complain about their costar publicly. infantile. and he does it the thursday before presidents weekend. i cannot think of anything less presidential. >> jimmy: you're right. >> you're supposed to be a president. >> jimmy: he is. >> buck up, tony, buck up. >> jimmy: he brought shame to the office. [ cheers and applause ] >> airing our dirty laundry. buck up. >> jimmy: i take it that it is true? >> it is true.
>> jimmy: you're on the cover of "entertainment weekly." i think -- was this this week? >> i think it was last week. >> jimmy: i was looking at this, first of all embarrassed you all wore the same thing. [ laughter ] >> who wore it better, jimmy? >> jimmy: you, of course. it says that four friends, one conversation, a thousand ideas. are you friends with all these people? >> i am, actually. i am. >> jimmy: were you friends -- >> i think i am. they might disagree. but i am. >> jimmy: were you friends before the magazine cover? >> yes, we were. and it's a testament that we're still friends after the magazine cover. >> jimmy: did they know you were friends? or did they just put you together and say, we're going to say they're friends? >> no, they kind of -- they reached out to some of us and asked, who should we pull together? >> jimmy: i see. if you had to rank your friends from this cover -- [ laughter ] who would be number one, who would be number three? number two can be presumed. >> i like them all equally but i have known eva longoria the longest.
>> jimmy: so eva's number one -- >> no, she just has more longevity in the group. these girls are amazing. >> jimmy: when you see each other do you clump together in this way? >> and usually all wear the same fade of jean color, yes. >> jimmy: that's nice and a good article too. >> don't be jealous. >> jimmy: i would have liked to have been a friend in there, wouldn't that have been nice? >> it would have been. >> jimmy: it's sexist it's all women on the cover no guys at all. >> give me a break there's guys on the cover all the time. >> jimmy: i haven't seen one. well, it's very good to see you. congratulations on everything. the show is -- i saw tonight's episode. it is absolutely insane. in every good way. it's called "scandal." if you haven't seen it you should. thursday nights, 9:00, abc. we want you to watch kerry live on the oscars sunday, february 28th, 7:00 eastern, 4:00 pacific. be right back with nikolaj coster-waldau! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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he plays the kingslayer jamie lannister on "game of thrones" and now he's in the movies, too. starting february 26th you can see him as the falcon deity horus in "gods of egypt." please welcome nikolaj coster-waldau. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how are you? i have to ask, did you meet kerry washington's mom? >> valerie, yes, valerie. >> jimmy: valerie, oh. >> she's a beautiful, wonderful lady. >> jimmy: i would imagine she is, yeah. did she ask you if jon snow is dead? >> she -- she did, yeah. >> jimmy: she did, yeah. >> she did, everyone asks that. >> jimmy: everyone does. how many times a day would you say you get asked that? >> i kind of -- i kind of preempt it now. i kind of start, whenever i meet someone, i say "jon snow is dead." >> jimmy: that's your opening line? >> sometimes i'm in a shop and
the poor person goes, "yeah, it will be $12.50." >> jimmy: wait a second, are you saying on the record jon snow is dead? >> he was stabbed 50 times in the heart. >> jimmy: okay. >> he's dead. you know. >> jimmy: but there are stranger things that happen on that show. in fact, there's a whole wall of heads that are alive. i mean, you know. >> got a good point, a good point. >> jimmy: it wouldn't be the biggest leap we've experienced on "game of thrones." >> spoiler. at the end of season five, he's dead. >> jimmy: he's dead, okay. >> but -- >> jimmy: i see, ah. is he still walking? can he still walk? >> he's stabbed 50 times in the heart, he's not moving, he's out cold, he's gone. >> jimmy: i can only imagine what this might like for him. you may not know if he's dead. >> you're right. >> jimmy: you guys don't have scenes together. you don't even know him probably.
>> i don't know anything. let's face it. >> jimmy: now that the books -- they've gone past the books. everything is a surprise to everyone. >> yeah, which is wonderful. because i know there was that whole time, the other season, where you had all the book readers and they would like have their little smug smile on their face because they knew what was going to happen. >> jimmy: my parents are two of those people, yeah. my dad read the books twice in a row. and my parents are not that type. it's a very, very strange -- it's very -- i don't know if my dad's ever read anything before. he goes, yeah, yeah, and this one jamie -- you know, he tells me all the stuff. i go, don't tell me the stuff! but he won't stop. now he's been stopped because the book hasn't come out. >> i know. >> jimmy: now even you don't know what's going to go on. >> i know what's going to happen season six. >> jimmy: you know the whole thing? >> yeah. >> jimmy: okay. you're probably so sick of this "game of thrones" you want them to chop your head off already. >> it might already have.
>> jimmy: the hand goes with the head, yeah. >> the monty python thing. >> jimmy: that's right. that would be a nice ending. >> that would be great. go back and fight! >> jimmy: tell me about this movie you're in, "gods of egypt." based on a true story? [ laughter ] >> yeah. no, it's -- no it's based -- a true fantasy. which is basically -- i mean, alex peres, the director, took these amazing stories from egyptian mythology and created this parallel univse, this crazy action-adventure story. i play an eight-foot-tall god who transforms into this falcon thing when he gets pissed off. >> jimmy: of all the bird gods a falcon would be one of the top ones. >> it's cool. >> jimmy: a falcon. >> i grew up, i always wanted to be big bird. so this was like -- for an actor, a dream come true. a big golden bird. >> jimmy: you wanted to be big bird from sesame street? >> yeah. >> jimmy: they have big bird in denmark? >> yeah, of course. >> jimmy: that's the one you picked?
>> that's the one. >> jimmy: why? >> when i read the script and he said he transforms into a golden falcon i was like, this is it. this is it. i made it. >> jimmy: have you been on sesame street? >> no, i haven't. >> jimmy: when they hear this they're going to go nuts. >> oh my god. >> jimmy: big bird's your favorite? >> yeah. who's your favorite? >> jimmy: wow, that's a really tough question. i have three, i think. ernie is one of my favorites. because he's -- ernie's kind of a [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] if you think about it. i mean, poor bert, he has to deal with so much abuse. i love oscar the grouch. >> oh yeah. >> jimmy: because, you know. i like the idea that he's got a whole world down in his garbage can. and then i would say -- cookie monster is a maniac. >> yeah. >> jimmy: he doesn't even eat the cookies, he smashes them all over his face. >> come on. that's true. >> jimmy: imagine how much fun he would be at parties if he was a real guy. >> that's true. >> jimmy: so i think i'd have to go with cookie monster as my favorite. >> what about big bird?
>> jimmy: i love big bird, don't get me wrong, no offense to big bird. no offense to the family, kermit, all great. but -- hey. yeah. you know what i'm saying. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's weird. i didn't know that was on in denmark. i guess that's on all over the world. what the hell's going on in denmark? [ laughter ] >> well -- >> jimmy: when you hear bernie sanders, he's so in love with denmark. >> thank you for all this entertainment with your political process. it's fascinating to follow. >> jimmy: glad you're enjoying it. [ laughter ] we see it as kind of a problem. we don't see these people as muppets, we see them as our leaders. >> really? >> jimmy: yes. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: be straight with me, are you guys laughing at us over there? >> well -- it's -- we laugh through tears. because it's kind of an important job for the rest of us as well.
>> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> and -- but, you know, we enjoy -- we believe in democracy. you have your way of doing and we have another way of doing it. >> jimmy: could you tell us about your way? we have not figured out our way. [ laughter ] our way results in almost no movement whatsoever. >> the ratings. >> jimmy: yeah. >> it's all about the ratings. >> jimmy: everyone else is suffering. >> exactly. >> jimmy: wow. is that reported on every day? >> all the time. >> jimmy: really? >> well, because it is really important, you know. >> jimmy: the weird thing is we don't know if you have a president or a king or an emperor -- there could be a pastry running your country. we have no idea. >> i know. >> jimmy: what do you have over there? >> we have a prime minister. we have a lot of different parties. and you have to, you know -- one vote counts and then you -- whoever gets the most votes wins. >> jimmy: interesting. we don't always do it like that. >> i know. >> jimmy: do you have people who are bona fide crazy people that reach the highest levels of government?
>> we haven't quite reached that level of insanity. >> jimmy: oh, okay, all right. you're a little behind. we really don't know. >> who knows. >> thank you for representing your country here. >> thanks. >> i don't even know you're really from denmark, this could be a fake accent. >> it is. >> who the hell knows what's going on with you. i do know you're in a movie. that is true? >> yes. >> jimmy: there we go. "gods of egypt" opens in theaters a week from tomorrow. nikolaj coster-waldau! be right back with jason derulo. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> dicky: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by samsung.
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>> dicky: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by samsung. >> jimmy: thanks to kerry washington, thanks to nikolaj coster-waldau and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time. "nightline" is next. but first, this is his album. it's called "everything is 4." here with the songs "want to want me" and "get ugly," jason derulo!
♪ ♪ it's too hard to sleep i got the sheets on the floor nothing on me ♪ ♪ and i can't take it no more it's a hundred degrees ♪ ♪ i got one foot out the door where are my keys cause i gotta leave yeah ♪ ♪ in the back of the cab i tipped the driver ahead of time get me there fast ♪ ♪ i got your body on my mind i want it bad ♪ ♪ ooh just the thought of you gets me so high so high ♪ ♪ girl you're the one i want to want me and if you want me girl you got me ♪ ♪ there's nothin i no i wouldn't do i wouldn't do ♪ ♪ just to get up next to you
♪ girl you're the one i want to want me and if you want me girl you got me ♪ ♪ there's nothin i no i wouldn't do i wouldn't do ♪ just to get up next to you ♪ ♪ ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh just to get up next to you ♪ ♪ ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh get up get up get up get up ♪ ♪ ♪ oh my oh my oh my god this girl straight and this girl not ♪ ♪ tipsy off that peach ciroc like la la la ♪ ♪ ching-a-lang-lang ching-a-ling-a-lang-lang jeans so tight i could see loose change ♪ ♪ do your thang thang girl do that thang like la la la ♪ ♪ tell them pretty faced girls tryna brass each other ♪ ♪ and them undercover freaks who ain't nun' but trouble ♪
♪ baby i'm a tell you some only cause i love ya people all around the world ♪ ♪ sexy mother get ugly ♪ ♪ get ugly baby get ugly ♪ you're too sexy to me sexy to me you're too sexy to me sexy to me ♪ ♪ ♪ i can't i can't even lie i'm about to be that guy ♪ ♪ someone else gon have to drive me home la la la ohh ♪ ♪ bang-a-rang-rang bang-a-ring-a-rang-rang bass in the trunk vibrate that thang ♪ ♪ do your thang thang girl do that thang like ♪ ♪ tell them pretty faced girls tryna brass each other ♪ ♪ and them undercover freaks who ain't nun but trouble ♪
♪ baby i'm a tell you some only cause i love ya people all around the world ♪ ♪ sexy -- get ugly ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ you're too sexy to me sexy to me ♪ ♪ you're too sexy to me sexy to me ♪ ♪ so sexy damn that's ugly ♪ ♪ everybody lose control let's get ugly dysfunctional ♪ ♪ everybody lose control let's get ugly dysfunctional ♪ ♪ tell them pretty faced girls tryna brass each other ♪ ♪ and them undercover freaks who aint nun but trouble ♪ ♪ baby i'm a tell you some only cause i love ya people all around the world ♪ ♪ sexy -- ooh ♪
this is "nightline." >> tonight, presidential candidates hitting below the belt. >> maybe make sure his pants weren't wet, i don't know. >> rubio! >> this war of words on the eve of a big vote for the democrats. >> how do you keep your energy level up? >> because i'm young, not old like you. >> we're behind the scenes with bernie sanders. will these crowds be enough to edge out the odds-on favorite in south carolina? journey to the oscars. brie larson's breakthrough role in "room." >> i want a different story! >> no, this is the story that you get! >> nominated for best actress. how playing in young mother echoed her own childhood. >>py my mom couldn't afford a happy meal. >> first the "nightline 5."